Giving moms a break not only gives them that break, but acknowledges everything they're doing and how much it takes to work and raise a family and be a partner if she's partnered and it takes a lot. And so I think giving a break is a really loving gift and a way to acknowledge that. I'm Kyra Blackwell. I'm Rosie Garen and you're listening to the Wirecutter Show. Kyra, Mother's Day is coming up. Woo! Okay, so tell me all the things that you're going to get your mom for Mother's Day and we'll bleep it out in post. Oh, okay. Well, first first first of all, happy birthday and Mother's Day, Mom. Woah. Yeah, it's a big one. Twofer. It's a big one for us. Um, I'm going to get her a really beautiful bouquet flowers. Love. And I think I'm going to get her a book subscription because she has been reading a lot more and I want her to have stuff that's fun to read. I love this. I think you are really thoughtful about how you think about gifting and I try to be as well, but like there lots of different people out there wanting lots of different types of stuff, maybe not wanting things at all. For sure. And I feel like every year that Mother's Day comes around, you want to acknowledge the mom or the maternal figure in your life, but it's like all right, let me dig deep. What are we doing this year? I mean, even you, you have Mother's Day coming up. You are a mom and also your wife is too. So that's a whole thing. Like it's hard to navigate because it comes every year, so you have to find a new thing at least once a year. It can feel like you don't want to just tread the same ground all over again. Totally. And to be fair, it's not necessarily about the gifts. It's I think about the acknowledgement of the role mothers play in our lives and quality time. But it's also about the gifts. You know, sometimes. So we're going to talk to Sam Shea today. I love Samantha Shea. She is so gifted at what she does. She is a staff writer on our gifting team and is basically exactly what it sounds like. She literally shops for gifts and reports on it for Wirecutter all year round. So she always comes with surprising and delightful things that you can do for the people in your lives and like it'll really convey your love and your thought for this person and I really think she's going to come up with some fresh ideas for Mother's Day. So we're going to kick her some personality types and we'll see what she's got to recommend. We'll be right back. Welcome back. Our guest today is Samantha Shea. Sam is a staff writer on our gifting team and she's written about some really esoteric gift topics. Gifts for travelers, coffee lovers, pickleball players, co-workers, engagement gifts, and gifts for people who love to clean. I love your job, Sam. Are people still playing pickleball? My aunt sure is. Well, there you go. Sam, welcome back. Thank you. I love my job, too. We love having you here. It's always really fun. being here. So we know there a lot of ways to celebrate Mother's Day. It can be really lovely. It can be a difficult day for people who've experienced loss of some kind and it can be a great opportunity to acknowledge mothers or for the sake of our conversation, maternal figures in our lives of any kind. So today we're going to break the topic of gifting down by type of mom. For all of the folks who are listening, we know that your person might not fit exactly into a box. That's fair. We contain multitudes, but I think this is a fun way to think about gifting for all different types of folks. Yeah, for sure. That's kind of how we approach it. Also acknowledging that we contain multitudes and no two people are exactly alike, but we kind of think about types because we'd want to try and meet as many people as we can. I love that and before we even jump into the kind of moms that you've been researching for Mother's Day, Sam, can you just quickly explain what your job actually is at Wirecutter? I mean, gift writer sounds so fun and whimsical, but for those who don't know, who didn't listen to our previous episodes with you, what is that and how do you interpret Wirecutter's approach to curating gift guides? Yeah, so we do what you said we do. We spend all year looking for gifts and a lot of that is combing through what our colleagues already pick out in the pages of Wirecutter and a lot of it is just being out in the world, being on the internet, being on social media, being on Reddit, finding cool things. Like my job is really fun. I look around for stuff I like or stuff I think somebody would like for some reason. I always say like the body of knowledge at Wirecutter is astounding. Like there are writers who actually know a lot about their topic and they I don't know, they can take apart a toaster and put it back together or they can tell you what emergency supplies you need and they know how smart TVs work and like I just have good taste. That's it. And you bring it all together. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay, let's run down some archetypes and Sam, talk about some gift ideas that you think might work. We'll start with the new mom. Let's say a first-time parent. Yeah, I actually have done gift guides for the new mom. So I think you start out thinking about the new mom experience as best as you can and she's probably really exhausted and a little overwhelmed and she's just been through what is a really huge transition whether it's her first baby or not. And I assume that she's gotten a lot of baby stuff at a baby shower. So I like to think about Mother's Day as really focusing on her and not getting her baby stuff, but getting stuff that makes her life easier in some way, lightens her load, pampers her. Are you trying to tell me that you see mothers as people? Well, I mean, they're just extensions of their children really, but No, but I I go for kind of like the soft, cozy, luxurious, pampering vibe for new mothers. I really love some of the sweatpants we have in our guides, both in our sweatpants guide and we include them in a bunch of gift guides. She's going to be in sweatpants and loungewear all the time anyway, so you know, these can kind of help her be comfortable and also maybe not feel like a total schlub all the time, which I did as a new mom and I know a lot of new moms do. So there's these Le Bon Shop balloon pants. I am not a new mom, but I wear them all the time and I wear them out of the house and they're really cute. Um, and I also for a less expensive version, love the Gap high-rise vintage sweatpants that we have all over the place on Wirecutter. Super cozy, kind of stylish. I have them in hot pink. Love. Love them. So I just think, you know, who can't use more sweatpants? And then I also think kind of leaning into self-care, but not in the goofy way. She doesn't have time to take a luxurious bath most likely, like most new moms can't even take a shower, so I like these Soft Service buffing bars we have just because they're really exhilarating. They have these micro crystals in them and you scrub your skin and it exfoliates, but it also just gives you kind of a wake up. And then finally, lip balm and my favorite is lanolin nipple cream, which is like a two birds thing for a new mom because it's designed to put on sore nipples from nursing, but it works so well as lip balm for dry lips. And and new moms are often dehydrated if they're nursing and particularly. So It's a twofer. my recs. It's a twofer one, exactly. Put it on your nipples, put it on your lips. I like it. I have a sister-in-law who is currently pregnant. Super excited for my little baby nephew, but she's going to be still pregnant through Mother's Day. Does that count as a new mother? Should her husband, aka my brother, intend to get her a Mother's Day gift? Yeah, sure, why not? I mean, Mother's Day gifts don't have to be huge, but it would be so nice to give her something that acknowledges her new status as a mom-to-be and just is a little bit, you know, just a little loving. Aw, love. So from mom-to-be to let's talk about first-time grandmother. Big like excited energy. Yeah, I think some new moms kind of have trouble with the adjustment of like it's not just your life anymore and your identity gets can get a little confused and all of that. I think grandmas are just like, "Woohoo, this is my new identity." You know, for the most part. So I lean a little bit more like sentimental when it comes to grandparents. I love like a personalized piece of jewelry if that woman happens to be a jewelry wearer that kind of declares or commemorates their new status as a grandma. So like you know, there's all these initial necklaces where you can get a disc or a bar or whatever it is or you could get a little birthstone charm or you know, whatever it is. We love this company Golden. I just did a guide to jewelry, so I have jewelry on the brain all the time and I researched a ton of online jewelry brands and Golden is really good because they come in different metals and price points. So like if you want to spend 40 bucks, you can. If you want to spend 250 on solid gold, you can. And can you personalize stuff from Golden? Yeah, everything's personalized. So you can get names, you can get initials, you get birth flowers and birthstones and you know, there's like kind of something for every taste. So if she's that type, I love that stuff. I also really stand by the Wirecutter favorite and old school hit, the Aura digital frames. These are the frames you can like send digital photos to from afar and they scroll through. So especially if the grandma's far away from her grandkids, it's a nice way. I gave one to my mother in law. She loves it. I like really scored on that gift. So, it's an oldie but a goodie. We gave one to my mom years ago when my kids were small and now when we go visit her, they just post up and sit and look at the photos of them when they were babies like which they think was 300 years ago and Look how far I've come. Yeah. It's a sweet gift. It's really sweet. It's sentimental but it's not like cheesy. So, I really like those. And then for the grandma who is maybe not leaning so much into the like cozy soft and fuzzy grandma, the cookie baking grandma or whatever that may be, there's a book called The Grandmothers by Doris Lessing who's a writer that I love and it's four short novels. Shocking and intimate stories of love, passion, and uncomfortably honest truth. So, that gives you a little taste of what it's about. So, it's a fictional examination of grandmotherhood for kind of the unsentimental like intellectual artsy grandma. It's not warm and fuzzy but it's really smart and really great. For the cool grandmas out there. I like it. grandmas out there who are grandmas but they're still like being fierce. Yeah.

Sam, how about the empty nest moms? What are some ideas that they might really appreciate maybe because they're struggling with having their children out of the house or maybe they're moms who are experiencing kind of a second youth and loving it but they do still have an empty house. Yeah. So, that's me and I don't I hate to admit it but I can't like to the struggling part because I am the world's happiest empty nester. I mean, I love my kids. I miss my kids. Blah blah blah but it really has been liberating, let's say. Yada yada yada. It's amazing. The second youth thing really rings true. So, I would lean into like hobbies and passions of hers some of which may have like fallen by the wayside while she was busy raising children. I know that was true for me. It's true for a lot of people. I know a lot of people my age who are looking, you know, or about to be empty nesters who are new empty nesters and they're like, "Oh my god, you know, rediscovering things that they really loved or really made them feel like themselves before everything got busy. I'm on record on Wirecutter as being a huge fan of the Kuretake Gansai watercolors. these paints. I love these paints so much. I probably have mentioned them every time I've been on the podcast. You use these paints, right? You are right. them and they've like turned me into a hobbyist painter. It's become like a really meditative wonderful creative expression for me. So, I'm a big fan of that. If she's a reader, I'm a big fan of a book subscription service and I say that rather than just giving a book because you get like a surprise every month. So, it's kind of like the gift that keeps on giving. Sam, I'll always be grateful to you for introducing me to Libro.fm, this audiobook service which you've discussed and recommended on the show before. It's wonderful. I love it so much. I'm a big audiobook. So, if she's an audiobook fan, get her a subscription to Libro.fm. And you can buy as many credits as you want. So, you know, you can say like, "Here's your next 10 audiobooks or five or whatever it is you want." I also love with Libro.fm that you can support a bookstore that means something to you. Yeah. So, it supports independent brick and mortar stores. It's basically the independent bookstore way of getting audiobooks to you. Great company and the service is amazing. So, for a physical book subscription, I really love Books Are Magic in Brooklyn. You can get the subscription anywhere in the country and they just have great taste. We have a guide for book subscriptions and depending on your mom or your maternal figure's taste, you'll be able to find one to meet that whether it's genre or literary or historical, whatever. So, I love that gift. I also love and this is like a little, you know, moving away from the Wirecutter standards but I like like a gift certificate to her favorite restaurant if she likes food and dinner is a chore, cooking dinner. I feel like I love to cook and cooking dinner every single night is a huge chore that I'm happy to be done with. I ate Frosted Mini-Wheats for dinner last night. Swear to god. You really are thriving. it up. And then I went out for frozen yogurt and to a movie. So, Frozen yogurt is something to look forward to. I don't like I could cry. I won't but I could. There's also this hat that we just put in the Mother's Day gift guide um and it just says, "Don't ask me what's for dinner." And I love that cuz it just captures like so much about motherhood in a single sentence. My favorite like cartoon is just a mom with her head in her hands being like, "No one told me they had to have dinner every night." And that's like kind of how it feels. So, I love that hat. Speaking of the tired mom, I'd love some gift ideas for her. Whoever she Who whoever she She is all of us. She is me. She is me. She is me. Yes. We have a gift guide on the site of people who love to sleep and on there are all little like luxuries and little things, eye masks and cozy socks and bath soap and white noise machines and all these things to supposedly help people sleep. I'm a huge fan of a night away in a hotel. Mhm. When my kids were like 6 months old, I think I had twins like Rosie and that's what I asked for not for Mother's Day but I think I kind of broke down crying to my husband one day. I was like, "I just want one night in a hotel with like cold crispy sheets." And so, it's only one night but it could be the gift of a good night's sleep. Giving mom a break not only gives them that break but acknowledges everything they're doing and how much it takes to work and raise a family and be a partner if she's partnered and it takes a lot and so, I think giving a break is a really loving gift and a way to acknowledge that.

Before we jump back in, I want to know what are your cardinal rules for gift giving? What are the hills that you will die on? Okay. So, first of all, get them something they most likely wouldn't get themselves and that applies to almost everyone. Like if I ask my husband what he wants for any given gift giving occasion, he'll be like, "Oh, I need new socks." And I'm not going to buy you your like stupid white tube socks. That's not really a gift. You're a grown man. Buy them yourself. Well, well, I'm glad the love is still there. Well, I mean, I want to give something, you know, surprising and delightful. So, that's kind of a rule is like get them something they wouldn't buy themselves. My biggest rule probably is don't add to anyone's to-do list. Only give someone a plant if they're a well-documented plant lover and want plants and like caring for them. Otherwise, it's just another thing for them to take care of. Don't give a cookbook to somebody who doesn't like to cook thinking you're helping them out. Like just leave them be. They don't like to cook. They don't want a cookbook. My nightmare is a jigsaw puzzle for example. People love them, just not me. You know, even a book if the person's not a reader is just going to feel like something they should be doing. So, that's my basic rule is like give them something that's going to make them relaxed and feel beautiful and smart and accomplished and loved but do not add to their to-do list. Mhm. My friend's kids I once gifted they really wanted a toy kitchen and I like could not in good faith drop that box with 174 pieces at their house cuz they're moms of young kids and so, we visited and while we visited, I built the kitchen cuz I was like, "I'm not going to feel good about leaving you with this work." Yeah. Oh my god, that's a great example. Don't give new parents something they have to put together. It's rude. You also added your time, too. Like you're giving them the gift of like you spent the time with them and you built the thing, too. It's time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which is my other rule for for Mother's Day in particular but, you know, works for anything is that the gift of your time and attention is always appreciated especially by your mom or mother figure. We know people and people's personalities don't necessarily fit into neat boxes but just for the sake of this episode, we're tossing some personality types to you, Sam. Let's jump back in with ideas for the outdoorsy or adventurous mom. Okay, this is a mom I always or archetype or whatever I always have in mind so that I don't go like too traditionally feminine and girly on gift guides for women as I try and imagine like my inner river rafting guide mom or something. I love the Rumpl outdoor blanket. You can keep it in the back of your Subaru or your RAV4 and it works as a picnic blanket. It's warm if you're camping. It's if you have a baby, it's like the best blanket to spread on the grass to set your baby on and no matter what mess they make, it's machine washable. It's really cute. So, love the Rumpl outdoor blanket. I'm also a big fan of these super soft cotton tie-dye beanies from this woman named Mira Blackman. I discovered these in a boutique in San Francisco. That's part of my job is poking around boutiques which is really fun cuz I get to find a lot of like small makers and artists that way and she is one. I just love this beanie. It's cotton, it's so soft, it's super cute and crunchy moms love beanies, so Those are my two Rex. How about the mom who likes sparkles? You just finished doing a lot of reporting on jewelry. Mhm. I love sparkles. I love jewelry, but I also love I'm like a magpie or something. I anything that glitters, I'm in. Okay, so there's these Wirecutter famous socks, Mariela Rosa laminated silk socks and they're kind of ridiculous. No one would ever spend $50 on a pair of metallic laminated silk socks for themselves or Oh my gosh I wouldn't. Absolutely wild. I'm looking at them. I love them so much. They come in all these different colors. They're the craziest little style boost. They're the shiniest, most beautiful things ever. I have a pair. I treat them like a pair of heirloom jewelry. Like I wash them inside out in a lingerie bag. I love these socks so much. It's hard to describe, but they look like they've been painted with thick metallic paint when you get them and then Yeah, like like they've been gold plated or something. Although they come in purple and pink and all this stuff. And then the first time you put them on the laminate kind of cracks. I know I don't know if I'm doing this justice, but just look at these socks. Look at these socks. I would be the happiest mom if someone gifted me those. And again, they meet like I would never buy them for myself, but they're sparkly, they're a little luxury, they have major style points, so I'm into them. And then of course jewelry, there are can't go wrong pieces of jewelry that almost everyone will like. Like if she has pierced ears I can almost guarantee like a little pave diamond huggie hoops. They cross all styles even crunchy moms, even punk rock moms, you know, anyone can wear these. And I really like the ones from Quince, which surprised me. I didn't think I would like Quince's jewelry as much as I ended up liking it. For basics and I like these little they're little huggie hoops. They're really sparkly, they're well-made, they're not going to fall out of your ear. I've been wearing one in like my second piercing for years. I never take my earrings out. And you can buy them in singles or in pairs. So if someone has like asymmetrical piercing, you can just spring for one earring. How about the foodie mom or the wine loving mom? Okay, so I'm going to get a teeny bit esoteric here because I am a huge lover of tinned fish, anchovies, sardines. did an episode on that, too. Yes, so classy these days. Yeah. Oh my god, it's like a huge trend. I just want to say like I was way ahead of this trend, way ahead, but whatever. Well, Fishwife, one of the tinned fish companies that I really love they do these gift packs and someone gave me this for Christmas and it was a gift pack and it was like so elegant and cool and it was full of tinned fish and like tinned fish servers and stuff. And they have a Mother's Day one, which I also love cuz it has the tinned fish in it and then it has a sardine bandana and I love a bandana. If she's not a little tinned fish fan, we love this Emile Henry produce bowl which is a big, wide ceramic bowl with a cork lid that also functions as a bowl. So underneath you put things that need to be dark and dry like onions and garlic and potatoes and things and on top you put your fresh produce and fruit. And so it keeps your produce long like it absorbs moisture and it's really pretty and I love it so much. So that's a good one for the foodie mom. What about the crafty mom? And maybe this could be a little bit difficult cuz it's hard to gift within people's established hobbies. So what do you recommend here? Well, like my dad's partner is an incredible fabric artist and knitter and crocheter and sewer and stuff. So like I always just give her a piece of beautiful fabric. So if somebody is established in their craft or art give them something that they can use. Like give them a really beautiful, expensive skein of yarn or a piece of fabric or beautiful beads, depending on what it is. If they're just someone who likes to dabble, craft kits are huge right now. What's a craft kit? A kit that will enable you to do a new kind of craft from beginning to end. So it has all the supplies and the directions and they're really aimed at beginners. And I love these things and they have them for everything. Some of the ones I like, there's a company called Unwind Studios that makes needlepoint kits and I don't know about you, but when I think of needlepoint, I think of like corny needlepoints of ships on pillows and stuff, but these are like really cool modern designs and an abstract needlepoint, it made me want to do needlepoint, which I've never done. And then what I was totally fell for were these embroidery kits from this artist named Kate Wyatt. And they are just crazy beautiful. A lot of them include beads, the patterns are so gorgeous. There's like botanical, there's birds, there's all sorts of there there's modern art, there's all sorts of stuff. And then for like something easier that's not going to take a lot of patience, there's a company called Join, J O Y N and they make block printing kits and it comes with the blocks, the ink, the roller and then even like a tote bag or a pouch or something and you can make either traditional patterns or wild modern patterns or whatever you want. You can make a really cute block printed thing and the the learning curve is much lower on that. That's awesome. I love that. Those are really unique gifts, too. Like for people again, people who are open to craftiness. And also for moms, like some of these are things if they have older children they could do like the block printing kit would be really cool to do with older kids.

So then there's the mom we all know and love, the I don't need anything, save your money mom. So Sam, if we suspect she's lying or we want to insist on getting her something, what do you recommend? First of all, I would believe her and just maybe get her give her the gift of your time and attention write her a nice card. Um if you're far away, send her flowers or some other little pick-me-up you think she would like. And don't forget the card, that's like the most important part of this type of gift. But if you really want to give a material gift, go for something that she can use up and be done with so that she doesn't have another thing in the house. So like a book or some fancy food or wine or you know, whatever she's into, a little self-care thingy or treat that she can use. I love this body oil and it's the name is French and I'm going to murder it, but it's like Centaure de Orient Fleur de Oise. Do any of you speak French? Can you help me out? Anyway, it's this body oil that I absolutely love. It smells amazing, it feels amazing. It smells so good. And it makes your it gives your skin it's like not greasy at all, but it gives your skin this little glow. I can't imagine anyone objecting to receiving that as a gift. We also have Wirecutter reviews for flower delivery services that you point Sam about maybe sending flowers from afar. I also would say if they're a chocolate person, boxed chocolates. Oh, absolutely. episode on boxed chocolates and there's some good options. I would love I just got boxed chocolates for my mother-in-law for my birthday and it was excellent. Sam, do you have any tips for a two-mother household? I'm looking at my colleague Rosie right now, actually, because not only does she have a two-mother household, she also has twins. Yeah, I mean that makes it tricky cuz you can't palm the kid off on one mom um cuz there's two of them. I think Rosie would be the expert on this, but I do know from talking to her that it can kind of be a drag because Mother's Day comes along and it's supposed to be a day for both of you and yet it's kind of not a day for either of you. I would suggest splitting up the weekend, honestly. Giving one mom one day and one mom the next day and whether that means that you're all together on both days and one gets to go out to breakfast, one gets breakfast in bed, whatever it is that person likes or if it's time by herself so that one takes the kids and the other one can do what they will. I mean, I do think that um obviously each mom deserves her special day. So the only way I could figure it out is you're just going to have to take the weekend and split it up. We'll have to. We we will just have to. Okay, finally, what if you're looking to gift yourself something in honor of Mother's Day? I imagine on that list is a night in a hotel But besides You got me. besides that. Yeah, so I think that this is a moment that moms should like give themselves something that they have denied themselves for whatever reason. When my kids were little, I used to ask for a couple hours to go read in the park on a blanket by myself. That was like the little gift to myself that I wanted. This year, I'm probably going to get myself a facial. These are things I don't normally Well, now I can read in the park till my heart's content because my kids are in college, but um when they were younger, that was like a really special treat for me. So whatever it is that makes you feel happy and is a little delight and you know, there's like weekly flower delivery if that's your thing. Get yourself a massage, get yourself a pair of like you know, beautiful shoes that you've been wanting, but you wouldn't buy yourself. Get yourself the fancy coffee drink. It can be as simple as that. Like give yourself a gift that makes you feel pampered and loved and feted in some way. Um and don't make it practical. Don't buy yourself tube socks cuz you need them. If you are the kind of person and I know they're out there that really has a hard time treating themselves, Mother's Day is the moment. It's hard. It's thankless a lot of time. Treat yourself well. Give yourself a nice gift. This is kind of in the same vein, but it's our final question, which I love asking, but I particularly love asking you. What's the last thing you've bought that you really love? Uh okay, I'm going to talk about my underwear. Um a friend told me about these and they're called every e v r y underwear. And they're like cotton, they're a little bit stretchy. They're the least sexy underwear on the planet. But possibly the most comfortable. Ooh. And they come in really like nice cool modern colors in addition to like black and white. And I bought one pair to see if I would like them and then I immediately went and pretty much replaced all the underwear in my drawer with these underwear. They're like a revelation to me. And I go up to my friends, they're kind of high cut and I go up and like pull them the top out from my pants and like, "Do you want to hear about my underwear?" That's how much I like them. Sam, the underwear evangelist. You're the best. Thank you so much for joining us. This was really fun. Thank you guys. We will link to you all of the products Sam recommended today in our show notes and be sure to check out wirecutter.com/gifts for more suggestions and gift guides. That's it for us, Kyra. See you next week. Bye. The Wirecutter Show is executive produced by me, Rosie Caren, and produced by Abigail Kiehl. Engineering support from Maddie Massielo and Nick Pittman. Today's episode was mixed by Catherine Anderson. Original music by Dan Powell, Marion Lozano, Eleisha Etop, Rowan Dimisto, Catherine Anderson, and Diane Wong. Cliff Leavy is Wirecutter's deputy publisher and general manager. Ben Frumin is Wirecutter's editor-in-chief. I'm Kyra Blackwell. And I'm Rosie Caren. Thank you for listening. Have you heard about the good word? You heard it from underpants. Somebody ask me about my underpants, please.