继续探讨NTR与绿帽癖的深层心理学

Hello everyone, I'm Anthony Welcome to my channel Today we continue to talk The Deeper Psychology of NTR and Cuckoldry

大家好，我是Anthony。欢迎来到我的频道。今天我们继续探讨NTR和绿帽癖的深层心理学。

In the previous video We explored NTR fantasies The origins of thought in Chinese society This sexual fantasy Although it seems to be influenced by Japanese adult movies But it is actually related to Chinese nationalism This larger narrative structure is closely connected to We also specifically analyzed China's nationalist propaganda How is it that by sexualizing the motherland Eroticizing national conflict Symbolizing women as a symbol of national chastity Thus, the national Especially male citizens Placed in a naturally castrated The position of the powerless voyeur

在之前的视频中，我们探讨了NTR幻想及其在中国社会思潮中的起源。这种性幻想，虽然看起来受到了日本成人电影的影响，但实际上与中国的民族主义叙事结构紧密相关。我们还专门分析了中国的民族主义宣传如何通过将祖国女性化、将民族冲突色情化、将女性象征化为国家贞洁的象征，从而将所有国民，特别是男性公民，置于一种天然被阉割的、无力的偷窥者位置。

When a male The earliest and most profound impressions of sex and passion Not from healthy love But it comes from the violation of wives and mothers As a member of this nation But the grand narrative is powerless His desire structure was distorted from the beginning He will unconsciously think The strongest emotional experience Inevitably, there is power imbalance, violence, Humiliation, sacrifice and other heavy things are linked together

当一个男性最早、最深刻的关于性和激情的印象，不是来自于健康的爱，而是来自于对妻子和母亲的侵犯时，作为这个宏大叙事中无力的成员，他的欲望结构从一开始就被扭曲了。他会无意识地认为，最强烈的情感体验必然与权力失衡、暴力、羞辱、牺牲等沉重的东西联系在一起。

Despite the official ideology is trying to experience through trauma and humiliation To inspire the people's fighting spirit To strive for the rejuvenation of the country and nation However, in reality This path is of course very difficult. The parties involved cannot become the mainstream ideology The successful person you are looking for in this case NTR Fantasy It becomes an alternative compensation strategy

尽管官方意识形态试图通过创伤和羞辱来激发民众的斗志，以争取国家和民族的复兴，但现实中，这条道路自然是非常困难的。当事人无法成为主流意识形态所寻找的成功人士时，在这种情况下，NTR幻想就变成了一种替代性的补偿策略。

So why this seemingly humiliating fantasy Will it bring pleasure? This seemingly masochistic sexual fantasy What kind of desire of the subject is satisfied? This video Let's break down the logic behind this in detail.

那么，为什么这种看似羞辱的幻想会带来愉悦？这种看似受虐的性幻想满足了主体怎样的欲望？本期视频，我们就来详细拆解背后的逻辑。

从自虐与羞辱中获取快感：与BDSM的共通性

I will post this video Put it in the list of "Psychology and Education" if Do you have any topics you want to discuss with me? You can contact my email to make an appointment

我会把这个视频放在“心理与教育”的列表里。如果你有什么想和我探讨的话题，可以通过邮件联系我预约。

We talk about the characteristics of NTR fantasy It is pleasure gained from self-abuse and humiliation In this sense It can be regarded as a special form of sadomasochism Shares a common psychological structure with BDSM So when we analyze a fantasy mechanism We can also learn from the endless variety of subcultures See similar background

我们来谈谈NTR幻想的特征，它是一种从自我虐待和羞辱中获取的愉悦。从这个意义上讲，它可以被看作是施虐受虐（BDSM）的一种特殊形式，与BDSM共享着相似的心理结构。因此，当我们分析一种幻想机制时，也可以从亚文化中无穷无尽的变体中看到相似的背景。

意识对幻想机制的影响：症状与自省的区别

But before discussing I still want to emphasize Our video is not about sadomasochism, NTR and other sexual fantasies are morally criticized Although such fantasies may be pathological It may stem from some kind of trauma and deprivation. However, our analysis It's not about making a final diagnosis of a person.

但在深入讨论之前，我还是想强调一下，我们的视频不是为了对施虐受虐、NTR或其他性幻想进行道德批判。尽管这类幻想可能是病态的，可能源于某种创伤和剥夺，但我们的分析目的不是对一个人做出最终诊断。

Because the human spiritual world has a characteristic That's when you become aware of your fantasy mechanism The nature of your fantasy changes This is different from the laws of the physical world. Without considering quantum mechanics and the case of microphysics Our observation and awareness of a phenomenon It will not affect the nature of the observed

因为人类的精神世界有一个特点：当你意识到你的幻想机制时，你的幻想的性质就会改变。这与物理世界的规律不同，不考虑量子力学和微观物理学的情况下，我们对一个现象的观察和觉察，不会影响被观察物的性质。

However, people’s spiritual world is different When a person is unconsciously driven by a fantasy His experiences are often extremely contradictory and painful. Illegal pleasure and real guilt, Anxiety and self-loathing are intertwined He didn't understand why he was attracted to such a morbid scene. He didn't dare to think about it I dare not tell others Falling into inner confusion and torment

然而，人们的精神世界是不同的。当一个人在无意识地被一种幻想驱动时，他的体验往往是极度矛盾和痛苦的：非法的快感与真实的内疚感、焦虑和自我厌恶交织在一起。他不明白自己为什么会被这种病态的场景所吸引，他不敢深思，也不敢告诉别人，沉沦于内心的困惑和折磨之中。

However Once the subject understands this fantasy mechanism Understanding my own trauma He will realize I don't really want to be destroyed. I'm just playing a loser. Then the nature of fantasy changes completely Pain and humiliation are no longer pure torture It becomes a controllable ritual element in the script. The subject is a slave to fantasy and trauma Active management and the master who organizes his own enjoyment

然而，一旦主体理解了这个幻想机制，理解了自己的创伤，他就会意识到：我并不真的想被摧毁，我只是在扮演一个失败者。那么幻想的性质就彻底改变了：痛苦和羞辱不再是纯粹的折磨，而变成了剧本中可控的仪式元素。主体从幻想和创伤的奴隶，变成了主动管理和组织自己享乐的主人。

Therefore, in the spiritual realm I think in principle everything is understandable. The reason why a person is obsessed with a certain kind of humiliating happiness Because People are not just pursuing happiness. Dislike of pain

因此，在精神领域，我认为原则上万事皆可理解。一个人之所以痴迷于某种羞辱性的幸福，是因为人不仅仅是在追求幸福，厌恶痛苦。

拉康的符号秩序与“杀害”了真实世界的开端

In Lacan's view The subject is not an inherently complete entity But in a series of alienated processes Constructed This process can be understood as moving from the real through the imaginary The triple movement that ultimately enters the symbolic realm

在拉康看来，主体不是一个原本完整的实体，而是在一系列异化的过程中被构建起来的。这个过程可以理解为从“实在界”经过“想象界”，最终进入“象征界”的三重运动。

At the beginning of life The baby is in a chaotic, undifferentiated state There is no clear boundary between him, his mother and the world All symbols, languages ​​and laws None of this exists here The baby experiences a magical feeling He has achieved his goals in this field. Unhindered This is the Real A pre-linguistic and pre-symbolic chaotic realm The individual is filled with intense energy and pleasure

生命之初，婴儿处于一种混沌、未分化的状态，他、他的母亲和世界之间没有清晰的界限，所有的符号、语言和法则都不存在于此。婴儿体验到一种魔幻的感觉，他能在这个领域里畅通无阻地达成目标。这就是“实在界”（The Real），一个前语言、前符号的混沌领域，个体充满了强烈的能量和愉悦。

As children learn language He entered the symbolic realm This is a language, symbol, The network of the big Other constituted by law and social rules For individuals It also means a deeper alienation and trauma The so-called symbol Using symbols and concepts To replace and substitute real things As Lacan said Language is the murder of things

随着孩子学习语言，他进入了“象征界”（The Symbolic），这是一个由“大他者”构成的、由语言、符号和规则构成的网络。对于个体而言，这也意味着更深层次的异化和创伤。所谓的符号，就是用符号和概念来替代和取代真实的事物。正如拉康所说，语言是对事物（things）的谋杀。

The subject from the beginning is thrown into the world of language Even a person's name Often before he was born Named by parents Individuals are endowed with various signifiers For example, "son", "student", "Chinese", etc. Our identities are defined and supported by these external symbols He also shapes the subject's desire These desires are no longer purely biological instincts It becomes the "desire of the other" It is the Other who tells us what is desirable

主体从一开始就被抛入了语言的世界。一个人的名字，往往在他出生前就被父母赋予了。个体被赋予了各种能指（signifiers），例如“儿子”、“学生”、“中国人”等等。我们的身份是由这些外在的符号来定义和支撑的，它也塑造了主体的欲望，这些欲望不再是纯粹的生物本能，而变成了“他者的欲望”（desire of the Other）——是大他者告诉我们什么是值得渴望的。

About this We have analyzed it in the video discussing fetish and soft pornography At that time we said In the edge culture of the Internet Individual desires On the surface It is a physiological desire directed towards the body of the opposite sex But in fact This desire is not simply sexual desire Or biological instinct But for the recognition and attention social desire This desire Even in many cases, it is directed towards the same sex That is, through group chats or comment areas A carnival with people of the same kind Thus confirming that one's sexual desire is sociable and legitimate The desire for recognition This is the deeper desire of the person involved.

关于这一点，我们在讨论恋物癖和软色情的那期视频里分析过。当时我们说过，在网络的边缘文化中，个体的欲望表面上是针对异性身体的生理欲望，但事实上，这种欲望不单纯是性欲或生物本能，而是对认可和关注的社会性欲望。这种欲望，甚至在很多情况下，是导向同性的——即通过群聊或评论区，与同类进行狂欢，从而确认自己的性欲望是合群的和合法的。对认可的渴望，才是当事人的深层欲望。

This example illustrates The desire of many people It is actually the result of symbolic order and symbol manipulation. Rather than some kind of biological instinct that you are born with

这个例子说明，很多人（的）欲望实际上是符号秩序和符号操控的结果，而非你与生俱来的某种生物本能。

From Lacan's statement We can feel He is rather pessimistic about language and symbols. He believed that the establishment of the symbolic order It must be based on the premise of "murdering" the real world When we use the word "tree" to refer to a real Living tree This tree is unique The reality of full branches and leaves Killed and cleared Instead, a universal abstract symbol therefore The price of one's entry into language and the symbolic order It means forever losing the most direct connection with the world. The most original connection This original loss This lack caused by the language itself This is what the symbolic order brings to each subject. The most fundamental trauma

从拉康的论述中，我们可以感受到他对语言和符号是相当悲观的。他认为，象征界的建立，必须以“谋杀”实在界为前提。当我们用“树”这个词来指代一棵真实的、活着的树时，这棵独一无二的、枝繁叶茂的实在之树就被谋杀和清理掉了，取而代之的是一个普遍的抽象符号。因此，一个人进入语言和象征界所付出的代价，意味着永远失去了与世界最直接的、最本源的连接。这种由语言本身造成的原始失落、这种缺失，就是象征界带给每个主体的最根本的创伤。

象征界：成长的代价与导向升华的“水坝”

That's it I have to emphasize Although Lacan Or many French philosophers Both see symbols and language as alienation and trauma But is this alienation and trauma necessarily a bad thing? Obviously not. It is better to say He is the price a person must pay for growth.

就是这样，我必须强调，虽然拉康或许多法国哲学家都将符号和语言视为异化和创伤，但这伤和异化一定是坏事吗？显然不是。更准确地说，这是人成长所必须付出的代价。

If a person does not experience the alienation brought by language So He actually fell into a state of mental illness. He is unable to form relationships with others Unable to communicate Can't distinguish between fantasy and reality

如果一个人没有经历语言带来的异化，那么他实际上是陷入了一种精神错乱的状态，他无法与他人建立关系，无法交流，也无法区分幻想与现实。

The symbolic order is like a dam It brought the original, chaotic, destructive flood Successfully converted into electricity, Irrigation, useful water flow A precise, positive, and inclusive symbolic order Able to guide people's original energy to the path of sublimation Sublimation is not repression But this original energy Transform into socially acceptable and appreciated goals Such as creation, love, career achievements Or other social contributions, etc.

象征界就像一个水坝，它将原始的、混乱的、具有破坏性的洪水，成功地转化成了电能、灌溉和有用的水流。一个精确、积极且包容的象征秩序，能够引导个体的原始能量走向升华（Sublimation）的道路。升华不是压抑，而是将这种原始能量转化为社会可接受和赞赏的目标，比如创造、爱、职业成就或其他社会贡献等。

A well-functioning symbolic order Like a rich and flexible vocabulary It can provide individuals with rich and inclusive identity labels, Values ​​and success criteria Make a person feel There are many ways to realize your own value So the individual feels Your energy can be gained through learning, Work and creation and other real actions gradually unfold and gain social recognition

一个运作良好的象征秩序，就像丰富的、灵活的词汇表一样，可以为个体提供丰富且包容的身份标签、价值观和成功标准，让人觉得有多种方式可以实现自我价值。因此，个体感到自己的能量可以通过学习、工作和创造等现实行动，逐步释放并获得社会认可。

Of course we have to admit Even in this most ideal situation The symbolic order itself It is also a domestication and compensation for a more primitive kind of pleasure. In this sense It is indeed a trauma The reason why we pursue real achievements To learn concepts and to think It is because of the most original Absolute bliss of becoming one with one's mother Lost forever The establishment of the symbolic order itself is based on the castration of this primitive enjoyment.

当然我们必须承认，即使在最理想的情况下，象征秩序本身也是对更原始的那种愉悦的驯化和补偿。从这个意义上讲，它确实是一种创伤。我们追求现实成就、学习概念和思考的原因，正是因为那个与母亲合为一体的、最原始的、绝对的至福永远失去了。象征秩序的建立本身就是基于对这种原始享乐的“阉割”。

A sensitive person will cherish the lost Primitive pleasure And feel a sense of sadness But he also clearly realized It's impossible to go back to that state. Just because a dam works well doesn't mean floods won't occur. Quite the opposite It is because the threat of floods is always there The dam must be in operation at all times The happiness we get Always just for the lost A substitute satisfaction for an impossible pleasure

一个敏感的人会珍视那些失去的原始愉悦，并感到一种悲伤，但他同时也清楚地认识到，不可能回到那种状态。一个水坝工作良好，并不意味着洪水不会发生。恰恰相反，正是因为洪水的威胁一直存在，水坝才必须时刻处于运作状态。我们所获得的快乐，永远只是对那种不可能的愉悦的一种替代性满足。

Of course all this All of this is done when the symbolic order is functioning well. However If the symbolic order is brutal, authoritarian, and rigid So It will block most of the roads to sublimation Make the individual feel It's too difficult to get pleasure from reality

当然，所有这一切都是在象征秩序运作良好的情况下发生的。然而，如果象征秩序是残酷、专制和僵化的，那么它就会堵塞大多数通往升华的道路，让个体觉得从现实中获取快乐变得太困难了。

僵化的象征秩序与NTR幻想的“秘密通道”

A bad symbolic order has several characteristics: First is It only provides a very small number of recognized identities And the definition is very narrow You either become one of the few who succeed Or become the majority loser at the same time He is also harsh and cruel. He's like a sadist. Constantly mocking the subject's incompetence Increase his anxiety

一个糟糕的象征秩序有几个特征：首先是，它只提供非常少数的、定义非常狭隘的被认可的身份，你要么成为少数成功者之一，要么成为多数的失败者。同时，它还非常苛刻和残酷，像一个施虐者一样，不断嘲讽主体的无能，增加他的焦虑。

When the normal path of "sublimation" is blocked When the reality of "happiness" becomes out of reach That raw, untamed energy It cannot flow to external social goals Of course it won't just disappear. It will regress to an earlier stage and more primitive ways of satisfaction It is in this context that NTR Fantasy Become an extremely attractive secret passage

当正常的“升华”道路被堵死，当现实中的“幸福”遥不可及时，那种原始的、未驯服的能量就无法流向外部的社会目标。它当然不会凭空消失，它会退化到更早期的、更原始的满足方式中去。正是在这种背景下，NTR幻想成了一个极具吸引力的秘密通道。

In reality The individual is required to be an active, Responsible, goal-oriented subject This is a high-level and sophisticated symbolic identity And in NTR fantasy Since we have obtained the reality Stable happiness is so difficult at the same time It is also difficult to resist the symbolic order Then the individual simply gives up this identity He no longer pursues the happiness brought by "success" But choose to fail completely and utterly

在现实中，个体被要求成为一个积极的、负责任的、目标导向的主体，这是一种高阶且复杂的象征身份。而在NTR幻想中，既然我们已经发现获得现实中稳定的幸福如此困难，同时也难以反抗象征秩序，那么个体干脆放弃了这种身份。他不再追求“成功”带来的幸福，而是选择彻底、完全地失败。

He through fantasy To stage the complete destruction of male identity My identity was destroyed, my partner was taken away, Dignity trampled upon He regressed himself into a Passive, powerless gazer He no longer needs to act Just look He went from a failed "subject" Regression to become an object of "failure to watch"

他通过幻想，来上演男性身份的彻底毁灭：我的身份被摧毁了，我的伴侣被夺走了，尊严被践踏。他将自己退化成一个被动的、无力的凝视者。他不再需要行动，只需要观看。他从一个失败的“主体”，退化成一个“失败的观看对象”。

讽刺性解脱：将屈辱转化为主动选择

I remembered a netizen I saw on a forum I can't find the original post now This netizen In every case involving foreign students On the topic of dating Chinese girls Crazy messages The content is Rendering foreign students Posing a huge threat to Chinese men Return to each message With a photo of hugging a girl There was a certain anger in his tone. There is a kind of weird feeling But his crazy message behavior It actually brought him some happiness. But he didn't realize it If he suddenly realized one day Own In fact, he is not a patriot who cares about his country and people. But because I like to experience this repeatedly The shame of being green Make yourself excited So this cycle of pleasure I will be overwhelmed by a huge sense of shame

我记得我在论坛上看到一个网友，我现在找不到原始帖子了。这位网友在每一个涉及外国留学生与中国女孩约会的话题下，都会疯狂留言，内容是渲染外国留学生对中国男性构成了巨大的威胁。他对每一条回复，都附上一张抱着女孩的照片。他的语气中带着某种愤怒，有一种怪异的感觉。但他的疯狂留言行为，实际上给他带来了一些快乐。但他自己没有意识到，如果他有一天突然意识到，自己其实并不是一个关心国家和人民的爱国者，而是因为喜欢反复体验这种“被戴绿帽”的羞耻感来让自己兴奋，那么这个愉悦的循环就会被巨大的羞耻感所淹没。

This is similar to our previous video discussing the method of mental failure. There are similarities That is, through self-deprecation Or destroy your own identity Exposing the absurdity of ideology Thus temporarily escaping the call of ideology Since I can't succeed Then I will fail. Even more failed than you thought This makes the success narrative ridiculous.

这与我们之前讨论的“精神性失败法”有相似之处，即通过自我贬低或者摧毁自己的身份，来暴露意识形态的荒谬性，从而暂时逃离意识形态的召唤。“既然我无法成功，那我就以一种比你想象的更彻底的方式失败，这让成功的叙事变得荒谬可笑。”

Another key to the mental failure method is to turn passivity into initiative This reduces the shame of being humiliated and judged. This means that the person feels that he or she is in a relationship with the opposite sex. There is no confidence So instead of waiting for a sudden blow in the future How about I humiliate myself in my fantasy? That way I have nothing to lose No more anxiety

“精神性失败法”的另一个关键是将“被动”转化为“主动”。这减少了被羞辱和被评判的羞耻感。这意味着，一个人在与异性关系中感到没有信心，与其等到未来被突然打击，何不干脆在幻想中先羞辱自己？这样我就一无所有可失，不再有焦虑。

This is similar to the SM game Abuse itself is painful However, when the masochist actively chooses to be masochistic Turning passivity into initiative On the contrary, psychologically Gained a subtle sense of control As if I could control the pain On what occasion and when did it happen? A victory over pain

这很像SM游戏，虐待本身是痛苦的，然而，当受虐者主动选择被虐时，将“被动”转化为“主动”，反而会在心理上获得一种微妙的控制感，好像我能控制痛苦在什么场合、在何时发生。这是一种对痛苦的胜利。

This way the parties can feel Pain doesn't come suddenly I arranged it in advance. It happened according to my plan It's the result of my choice This is how I eliminated passivity. and anxiety caused by uncertainty Experience a primitive joy

通过这种方式，当事人可以感受到痛苦不是突然降临的，而是我提前安排的，是按照我的计划发生的，是我选择的结果。这就是我消除了被动性和由不确定性带来的焦虑，体验到了一种原始的喜悦。

区分症状与自省：主动掌控带来的控制感

Of course, original doesn't necessarily mean bad. As we said at the beginning Conscious and unconscious Is it to distinguish whether a behavior is a symptom? Or the dividing line of self-exploration?

当然，“原始的”不一定意味着是坏的。正如我们一开始所说，有意识和无意识，是区分一个行为是“症状”还是“自我探索”的界限。

When a person is unconsciously controlled by this drive He doesn't understand why he is like this He experienced pleasure Experiencing confusion and compulsive pain again So that's a symptom.

当一个人无意识地被这种驱动力控制时，他不明白自己为什么会这样，他体验到了快感，又再次体验到困惑和强迫性的痛苦，那么这就是一种症状。

In establishing informed consent and rational sexual exploration activities The person may still be replaying the traumatic scene However Since this is a proactive and safe ritual Therefore, the toxicity of the trauma itself It has been largely eliminated

在建立知情同意和理性的性探索活动中，当事人可能仍然在重演创伤场景，然而，因为这是一种主动的、安全的仪式，所以创伤本身的毒性已经被大大消除了。

结语与联络方式

Let’s stop here for today If you have any confusion or questions Want to communicate with me Just contact my email directly

今天的分享就到这里。如果你有任何困惑或问题想与我沟通，直接联系我的邮箱即可。

for example You want to discuss an article or a paragraph with me A certain video, a certain social phenomenon Or your diary. Send me the relevant text in advance I will read it before the formal communication or You want to discuss your life experiences with me, Confusion and emotion All are possible

例如，你想和我探讨某篇文章或某段文字、某个视频、某种社会现象，或者你的日记。请提前把相关文本发给我，我会在正式沟通前阅读。或者，你想和我探讨你的人生经历、困惑和情感，都是可以的。

If you are concerned about privacy, security Any questions about payment and communication methods Please also tell me in time If you are unable to pay or join the membership Please also contact me I will provide other ways Please refer to this picture for details

如果你对隐私、安全、支付和沟通方式有任何顾虑，也请及时告诉我。如果你无法支付或加入会员，也请联系我，我会提供其他的方式。具体请参考图片信息。

I will post this video Put it in the list of "Psychology and Education" Also recommend to everyone Check out my other videos in this list Thank you for watching, goodbye!

我会把这个视频放在“心理与教育”的列表里，也推荐大家去看看我在这个列表里的其他视频。感谢收看，再见！